Just thought I would share something that has semi helped me get through. I felt I was always destined for something "big and important". But I'm finding out now more than ever, "the world doesn't need more people who are big and important. It needs more people who are nice, and compassionate" (assist to VeggieTales for the quote).
Seriously, I always felt like getting an "official" call to ministry was where I belonged. I need to be a Pastor, I need to be a missionary, I need to be this or I'm failing and not accomplishing anything.
Then it hit me while thinking about stuff the other day, I can honestly say I have done more for God just being myself while I'm out and about, than at any time when I actually did have a "ministry" position.
The people who would approach me and say they noticed me praying over food in Basic Training, or reading my Bible in Iraq, or saying "Jesus loves you" to an atheist confirm to me I don't need a title or label to accomplish things for God. No offense given or meant to actual ministry members.
If I can just accept the place God has put me in right now, then everything else will fall in place.
Bryan, my lovely brother - that is beautiful ! Truly heartfelt and lovely. I have thoughts like that from time to time but sadly I have no activities such as you describe (reading the Bible in Iraq?) to back my feelings up. So I do get down in the dumps about it more often than not. (http://i64.tinypic.com/vnnjvo.jpg)
Quote from: flaglady on July 01, 2019, 07:20:02 pmBryan, my lovely brother - that is beautiful ! Truly heartfelt and lovely. I have thoughts like that from time to time but sadly I have no activities such as you describe (reading the Bible in Iraq?) to back my feelings up. So I do get down in the dumps about it more often than not. (http://i64.tinypic.com/vnnjvo.jpg)
I understand your frustration. From a different POV sure, but still the feeling of not really accomplishing much can wear on a person who does genuinely love the Lord.
I have always thought that even if I couldn't do something concrete in ministry, then at least my prayers could reach a place I couldn't.
I am positive that when we get to heaven, we will only then realize how big (or little) an impact we have had for the Kingdom. My fear remains that I haven't and won't be able to do enough, but it's honestly out of my hands. I just have to trust Jesus to bring me the labor he has for me.
If that's being a Pastor, then Shepherd through me Lord.
If it's being a prayer warrior, then may the Spirit guide my words.
If my only purpose is ever to flip burgers at the local restaurant, then may I carry myself in a way that brings Yahweh glory and praise.
We all have different callings, but the same purpose, to bring God glory in whatever task he has assigned us.
You have both done more than you know.